It’s natural as time moves on to reflect and wonder if things really are as they “should” be or if we’ve “done”enough.
It seems to be that time of year where we think of the past, maybe feel lack for not being where we thought we would like to be by this time in our lives. Feeling isolated or lonely in who we are or in the relationships we have or don’t have. Maybe you’re starting to notice changing looks and perceiving a loss or soon-to-be fleeting beauty.
Regardless of what may tend to get you reeling and feeling down…I’ve found intention plays a huge role in how we feel on our big day.
I remember at 25, a few months before turning 26 starting to feel fearful. Up until that point I often felt self-conscious and too young to be doing what I was doing–then it flipped. Out of nowhere, just one day I woke up and felt scared. I was scared of being too old in the near future. 30 started to feel a whole lot closer and I was worried about what that might mean.
I was on the treadmill about a month out from my birthday and I remember thinking “I’m going to feel better every year from here on out…whatever it takes.”
I didn’t truly know what it meant in that moment, but it’s been something that has guided me, my intentions and opportunities that have come to me because of my clarity and commitment in that moment that I’ve held onto every year since.
I won’t even call this a goal, because there’s nothing specific attached to it. It changes every year based on the areas of life where I feel called to make the most progress and to feel even more vital, alive, free and beautiful in this physical body.
My birthday is in July and I notice around March/April every year I start to really focus on what this time leading up to my birthday will look like. What areas I’ll improve upon, where I’ll focus my energy, what new life lessons I’m integrating at a new level…
It doesn’t mean everything is perfect or that I’m suddenly looking younger or skinnier than I did at 26. That wasn’t the intention. I focus each year, especially in these months leading up to my birthday on being intentional on where I want to make progress.
This year getting ready to turn 39, I realized there was a new level for my health. I was feeling down and lacking energy much more often than I’ve been used to. Putting on weight, having a thyroid imbalance among other things. This was also starting to affect how I saw myself, having the energy to plan events ahead of time and so much more.
For me, sometimes it’s easy to still move my body every day, be conscious of what I’m eating and then two months go by and it’s almost as if these new patterns have snuck up on us. This is why I love to have times throughout the year where I look at everything from a larger perspective.
Is what I’m currently doing still working for me?
The habits that worked up until a few months prior were working, but as these things shifted I needed a new level of habits. No more making some things ok that weren’t really healthy that I thought I used to get away with.
It’s now about 16 weeks later and leading up to my birthday week I looked in the mirror last week and really saw the progress. My energy levels have been stable and consistently increasing each week. My knee pain and body swelling and inflammation is gone. My thyroid is balanced (I also do blood work twice a year to check in.)
As I felt better physically, I felt inspired to work out more consistently and use weights and do more to strengthen my body. I felt ready to commit to dates for my Journey Through the Chakras and online courses. (Coming first week of August 🙂 ) I felt inspired to gather my closest friends for a celebration and time in nature and on the beach. I desired to travel. Bought myself a new dress and be more social. Play more… So many areas of our lives are interconnected.
When our energy is low and our health is where we want it, it’s challenging to make sustainable progress without burning out.
Here are a few things I’ve done over the years to give you some ideas:
(this is just to help you brainstorm and think about what’s congruent to who you are.)
🎂At 28 Worked at and participated in over 20 personal development events that year as my highest value was (and is) learning.
🎂At 29 I did a 10-day silent retreat. I went without my phone, any connection or time with others and was able to process through a lot.
🎂At 30 I was more social. I moved to Los Angeles, was committing to my work and vision for myself in a new way. My friends threw me a beautiful pole-dancing pajama party that felt so nourishing to my soul and where I wanted this decade to be.
🎂Many years I’ve done between 1-3 weeks away cleansing somewhere focused on healing and fueling my body and serving my clients.
🎂At 34 I taught yoga and workshops almost daily for the months leading up to and on my birthday.
🎂This year, at 38, I’m now on week 15 of this new lifestyle cleanse that I love and I envision keeping many of these products and habits moving forward indefinitely as I integrate it into my life and have a few weeks a year where I’m more cleansing on a deeper level.
My intention for you is that you take the time to consciously choose whatever is most nourishing for you.
We don’t have to believe that aging has to feel bad or accept some things are just worse over time.
Yes, some things will change. We age. And, we can do it being the most connected and brightest version of ourselves regardless of if we still have perfect skin or can fit into our old jeans.
Progress is fulfilling. When we improve, connect to our spirit and love who we are beyond this physical body, we age gracefully. Inspired and ready to take on more of who we are and share that expression even more each year.
This is where I see my progress expanding, fueling and fulfilling me. I’ve done this at new levels every year since 26 and I feel more clear, connected, energized, energetic and loving towards myself and others more and more each year.
Feeling and knowing I’m showing up for myself.
I’m soft in the moments I need or desire to pause without beating myself up or pushing a boulder uphill trying to do and be more than is congruent with my values at that time. I’m willing to go at my own pace and accept I like to take my time with some things.
I let go of other people’s expectations and judgments of who I can, should or could be.
Accepting and loving who I am and choosing to expand consciously. Linking my values as I want to grow so I don’t run hard and then burn out.
Each year my energy is more stable and consistent. My emotions aren’t as up and down and aren’t running me (for the most part). I don’t get caught up in the problems, other people’s issues, drama or sucked into other people’s urgencies. I’m human, of course I let it in in moments, but I’m aware of it within minutes and have the tools now to clear, reflect, grow, ground and connect to me as quickly as I choose to.
I’m determined, focused and committed when I want to engage and up-level my physical body, fitness and strength.
I’m present purposeful, focused and clear on my vision when I’m working.
I take care of my skin, my body and my internal health. From what I eat, to what I put on my body, to staying flexible and strong and moving my body every day. I keep learning about food combining, organic all-natural skin care, hot springs, nature, technology detoxes, relaxing and balancing my nervous system for my optimal natural beauty.
All of this to me is progress. It’s not about getting to where you think you need to be, or at some lifetime milestone, or millions in the bank…it’s about consciously learning, loving and embracing who you are.
Over time, we find more love and ease with ourselves and more permission and love for others to be where they are in their life.
We’re present and available to all, but we choose to channel our energy towards those that show up equally for themselves.
When we don’t feel good about who we are and we’re at a lower energetic vibration, what we attract is more feedback to help us own our gifts, our value, our clarity of purpose and vision. As we see that, we create more ease, momentum and abundance.
We attract feedback when we’re disconnected, it comes in all forms and can be in any or all areas of life. It’s not because all this stuff happens to us, or because we’re a victim, but rather showing us where we are.
It only takes a moment of awareness to start to shift.
While all of this is possible all year-round and something we live into more and more each day, the truth is it’s helpful to have something like a birthday, meaningful event, new years to look at where we’ve been, where we’re going and who we are.
I invite you to reflect and meditate and/or journal about the following questions:
- How vital are you from today since your last birthday? What’s happened for you this past year? How is your vitality, energy, health, mental and emotional capacity?
- How clear are you on your life’s calling? Check in on a scale of 1-10 with yourself? There’s always room for your purpose to expand and evolve. Especially as new life stages happen. (Marriage, babies, kids leaving the home, divorce, new career.) As you are today, are you focused and inspired daily? Or are you distracting yourself and having trouble committing to You and your growth? Wherever you are on this scale, what’s next for you? If you’d like support, I’m here to help so please feel free to reach out. Click here to message me.
- How clear is your vision for the legacy you wish to leave? This doesn’t mean it’s all strategized yet, but it may mean you’re starting to envision it and maybe even taking steps towards this reality and starting to know what this looks like with the information you have now.
I’m off to celebrate today, how far I’ve come in life and in particular these last few months and enjoy everything present in my life and what’s to come.
Wishing you a fabulous weekend and I’d love to hear any tips you love to focus on as you approach your birthdays!